Trial Of This Life...

Oh, the trials of this life!! Right now, I am struggling with being single. It has intensified with graduation coming and the thought of not being a "kid" anymore. Also, the guy I like is in my Senior class. He is the most talkative guy ("talkative" in a good way) in the group, and since there are only two girls in the group, me and another, and Lindsey doesn't talk much, he talks more to me. He'll be talking to someone about something and say "Oh, Jocelyn thinks that's awesome...right Jocelyn?". He'll tell me about his week, or how amazing his new computer is (he's not nerdy or anything, even though that comment sounded like it). I like that he talks to me, but it's hard to not let my feelings get the better of me. I'll start to think, "Ohhh, he's talking to me so much!", or "Wow, this is weird, I'm actually talking to the guy I like". It's hard too because he's funny, has the greatest eyes, and is tall, 6'4"...PERFECT!! But that perfection is only skin deep. When I first started liking him, my friends mom (his teacher at one time) told me to make sure of his heart. She told me that his mom is a Christian, but his dad isn't. I found out that he doesn't really go to church, and noticed that he's kind of non-chalant in his conversations. That was hard for me to hear. I was sure he was perfect at first, but what a rude awakening. My friend Sara got to meet him when he was over the other night, and she told her mom about him. Her mom said that maybe this was a wake up call for me to get my head out of the clouds, and see him off his perfect pedestal.

So, now all I can do is pray for strength to not let my heart go any farther than it has, and pray for his heart, and the hearts of the rest of his family.